Goodbye 2009.....2010 I hope besides the new decade - you bring more joy.

Well, its been a while from the last post....quite a few months really.

As I am preparing to head to NYC for the New Year (no...not for NYE, I would have a panic attack in a crowd that big!), I am caught reflecting on the past decade. It has been a big one for me. In the past decade I graduated from college, moved over 1000 miles away from home, made new friends, and fell in love.

I am excited to see what the next decade will bring. If I can wish it will bring happiness for all of my friends and family...a wedding for me...and continued growth in my spirituality, career, and relationships with family and friends.

As a whole the past decade was a good one, but this past year has been extremely rough. Lots of ups and downs. Seemingly more downs than ups if I am completely honest.

In the past, I have always hoped for a romantic and picture perfect NYE. What would that entail? Oh you know, the dressy dresses, classy party, glass of champagne and the most perfect New Years kiss imaginable. I have sense given up on this fairy tale version of New Years Eve. And to be honest, I probably couldn't stay up that late if I wanted to. I know it shows my age (closer to thirty every day) but I am over the party scene....and tend to fall asleep around 9:30-10. Sure I can stay up if I really want to, or need to...but all in all, I become very cranky and tired.

Yesterday I was reflecting on the past years and memories that stood out most. The one I can distinctly remember matching up to the romantic notion I truly had in my mind was my second night at Carson-Newman. I had yet to really met the gang, and was feeling somewhat lonely. I found my way to the bench in front of the music building and took a seat. As I was sitting there a boy found me and made his way to sit and chat....sure this boy ended up being Dan Bellamy...and well, led to no where. But it was that brief movie moment..."if I sit here, maybe I will meet the man of my dreams." I think I have lived my life longing for those "movie moments."

Sure, I will roll my eyes at the cheesiness of them. And all and all I am not sure that I would really enjoy being apart of them. But deep inside there is a part of me that reflects on these moments and wonders how I would feel if my life was a movie. Then I think, THANK YOU GOD that its not. How terrible would it be if life were so scripted. With no originality...no hope of something different.

I am glad that this life hasn't been more like a movie, and I pray that the next decade isn't as well. I look forward to the unscripted life that I will live in the next 10 years. All I can hope is that I will live my life for the Lord...a life that is pleasing to him, and a life that allows me to grow. I look forward to deepening my relationships with the boyfriend and with my family and friends.

In the midst of this scattered blog I do have one major point:
I look forward to seeing where this new year will take me, because as the saying goes..."it can only go up from here."